The thirteenth birthday of our local princess looms. The girl is sweet, funny and smarter than the average bear. Still, she is acting her age. Here is some of what I’ve figured out so far.

Rule #1: Give it up. Whatever you say, it’s wrong. And if you say the opposite, that’s wrong too. Do not listen to grandmas who are quick to point out that we reap what we sow.

Rule #2: Get used to going to bed while she is still awake (or worse, before she comes home for the night.) Hope that she remembers to turn out the hall light. Assume all is well, or you will never get any sleep. Remain calm in the face of midnight phone calls from the bat mitzvah carpool begging for a sleepover.

Rule #3: Learn to text. The first time I received an encoded teen text from my own child I couldn’t decide whether to laugh or cry. At least I know she can write real English when required. Do not debate whether texting portends the death of civilization. Like it or not, micro-messages are  here to stay.

Rule #4: Shoes matter. A lot. Blue suede pumps with a rose on the toe… sparkly heels … perfect black ballet flats … brown suede boots. Thank heaven for DSW or I would be broke.

Rule #5: Listen. In the car, at the dinner table, during carpool. When invited into her bedroom, GO! Stay up as late as necessary to hear whatever she wants to tell you. You can sleep another night.

Rule #6: Look both ways before crossing the street. Don’t text while driving. Remember to feed the dog. Keep some perspective, Mom!